Haircut Misadventures in Thailand…

Gay and Ladyboy Haircuts… Not sure why i always find the gay guys and ladyboys to cut my hair. It’s not on purpose.

The ULTIMATE Thai Ladyboys Guide >

I rarely need a haircut, usually I just cut it myself. Unless I’m going to shave it – to 1cm or or something – and then I go to somebody with clippers. I’m usually in a hurry when I do this – I never plan for getting a haircut like this – I just run out and start looking in hair places.


There are roughly 700 within the city limits here – as there are in EVERY Thai city big or small. Over 700 seems to be the minimum required. These 700 are not the SAME 700 that you’ll see over time… at any point there are 500 of these 700 that are in transition… either starting their business or closing it.

It must be EVERY Thai girl’s dream to have a hair cutting place. So, at some point in their lives, maybe during many times, they open a hairdressers. Most of them fail due to NO business sense at all. Some do OK. I don’t think ANY of them make bank.

In Ubon I was driving around looking for someone and I see this girl with long straight hair… tall… cutting a woman’s hair. There aren’t any lights on in the place, it’s open air- Thai hairdresser style and the girl looks great from the street. Of course i’m in the Thai sun and my pupils are PINPRICKS because it’s so bright… and in hindsight I guess I couldn’t see that well into the room.

I park the motorbike and go in. I tell the girl I want my head shaved. She has clippers – so – no worries. I sit down and I watch her. I watch every movement. She’s a girl. Beautiful hair. Beautiful face. Nose job. Small chest. Nice waist, very thin… nice full hips and thin – this girl is very thin. Her shoulders are just a HINT more wide than maybe a girls’ should be. She is strong, and yet, not muscular. She has long fingers and nails. She moves like a woman.

She speaks just like a woman but her voice is maybe, MAYBE just a bit deep and not a natural flowing sing-song woman’s voice by any means. I’m 2 meters away from this girl and I don’t know… girl or ladyboy?

So, the 1st customer is finished and I’m next. I sit down. I thought, when I’m THIS close I’ll know. I look at everything. I look in her eyes to see if she has that ladyboy look. Whatever I think that is. I look at her legs, stomach, fingers, elbows, neck, adams apple – none, distance from armpit to elbow – a friend that runs bars in Patong told me he can usually tell (usually) by the length of the girls upper arm. A man has a shorter elbow to armpit length. A girl has a longer one. Ladyboys know this and compensate by standing in a weird way with their elbows on their waist a lot. Other women in Thailand don’t. She looked normal in that respect too. I was at a loss.

She cut my hair and I left, still wondering. Now, over the next 6 months I CONTINUED to get my hair cut there. ONLY out of curiousity. Anybody could have shaved my head, but I looked forward to going there to see if today would be the day I figured it out! And THAT DAY NEVER CAME!

What that means, is that she WAS a ladyboy. If you can’t figure out for sure – the DEFAULT truth is that she was a ladyboy. Women here are women. You can TELL a woman. But, if you can’t tell if a woman is a man – over some time – then SHE IS.

Anyway… so – recently I’m in Krabi. A seaside town that is a quick boat trip to a nice out of the way beach called “Railay beach”.

My girlfriend and I decide I need my head shaved again. We start looking and soon find a street with about 6 hair places. Most are men. I don’t go there. I saw one shop with 2 women cutting hair. We stop and go in. FINALLY, women cutting hair. WOW. I’m psyched. I’m psyched, until I see them wait on people that are arriving AFTER we did – with no mention of – “they had an appointment” or something like that… We leave. We had waited 40 minutes and so I was pi$$ed and I thought, OK, forget it – let’s get a MAN to cut it. At least it’s NOT a ladyboy.

We go in – and there are two men cutting hair. They have surgical masks over their faces which doesn’t bother me at first. They don’t look gay. I get called into the 2nd chair… and then I see it –

THE INCH LONG PINKY FINGER NAIL! UGGGH! THEN it all starts SMACKING MY SENSES at the same time… THE GAY ELEVATOR MUSIC! THE GAY MEN PHOTOS on the WALLS! THE FRESH YELLOW FLOWERS!

At the same time this is hitting me, THEN my girlfriend RAMPS UP the HORROR by AMBUSHING ME WITH SOME SPONTANEOUS VIDEO shots of my haircut!

Gay Haircut Video (large 8.9mb)

Gay Haircut Video (small 4.5mb)

JESUSH!

In the video I’m in the right side chair.

So here I am – in a 30 minute haircut with this gay guy that”s
spending WAY too much time manipulating where my head is and pulling my ear firmly but gently out of the way.. so he can make these PRECISION cuts on my head AFTER the clipper had already shaved it the way I wanted it, PLAIN.

Look at the video how he’s touching my head! LOOK at the pinky nail!!! DO I LIE? At :51 seconds in the video you can SEE the pinky nail very clearly on his left hand as he’s holding my head. I didn’t see the gay style cut coming… . Ithought he was going to just whack the sideburn area in a quick straight
line…

NOPE, he was doing a stylish staircase look on the area above my sideburns! BASTARD! I started to SCREAM but it was too late – I caught my breath instead. Hopefully he didn’t think I was all worked up over him.

So, I sat there silently while he did the other side too – so at least I matched. That’s the only way society will accept me – gotta match. So – we high tailed it out of there – he put perfumy talc on me and started to massage my neck – and that’s when I said, OK PAW LEAO! (ENOUGH) and we payed him the
50 baht ($1.30 usd)
and left.

Today my hair has grown in a bit, I’m going to go out in a few minutes and see what I can find. I THINK I saw a girl that cuts hair by the house here. We’ll see… I’ll film it and post it at the thaipulse.com site in the video section if the cutter is gay or ladyboy.

Update – I actually had a GIRL cut my hair – I had to stop her before SHE also did the crazy staircase on the side of my head – but, PAW LEAO! worked and I bailed out quick.