Foreign Girl’s Marriage to Thai Man Goes Sour

With the exception of one teacher I know – and I’m not at all sure how rosy that relationship is either – I can honestly say that I know of no foreign girls that have had good relationships with Thai men.

When I say “good” I mean the girl is not being beat, dominated, or taken advantage of for money.

I know of MANY Thai girls that are dealing with guys that beat them, cheat on them, and do whatever they damn well please too.

Recently I read a girl’s post about her marriage with a Thai teacher in Khon Kaen that went seriously sour as the guy appears to be a gambler with a big problem.

Read Rachel’s post here >

Author: Vern

I'm an American expat living in Thailand. I like to write informative pieces about life in, living in Thailand, including topics like: Thai People, Thai Culture, Nightlife, Technology, and I have published a lot of photographs, videos, and even books on Thailand that you can find at ThailandeBooks.com. There are many photographs of Thailand here - feel free to share with attribution (a link back to the home page). All written content on this site by Vern Lovic. Contact me at Google+.

12 thoughts on “Foreign Girl’s Marriage to Thai Man Goes Sour”

  1. I am dating a Thai man. And meeting him is the best thing that has ever happenend to me. He originates from a small fisherstown in the south in Satun. He is brought up moslim by his mum and gets a bit of the Buddhist values from his dad. He hasnt had an education. But he is putting in every effort for his little sister to get one. And like every relationship , its one I have to work on ..every cultural difference has to be explained, in order to understand why we are doing what we are doing.. and I am putting in the effort to learn some Thai. But he has never laid one finger on me. He has never yelled at me. How many girls do you know how have tried with a thai man, to come to the conclusion that most of them are a waist of time to date ? .. My boyfriend is now in the army, and he calls me every day. Sure, I know I earn more money then him, but that doesnt mean I am gonna be his sugar mum. I started explaining him what I have to pay with my money back home. How will you have them understand that we are not rich if you dont explain him our life standard .. ah well .. succesfull relationship foreign woman/thai man exist .. just give them a chance ..

  2. I am married to a Thai man and have a son with him. We met when he was working in my country. Our marriage is still young and one thing can be honest is this is not a fairy tale marriage as I am not accepted by his parents. I was very surprise when his parents keep pressing him in leaving me and my son, returning to his ex who is a Thai? Do Thai parents teach their child to leave their own family? My husband even listen to them and intend to leave but come back later on. We are still in shaky grounds but I do fear this will happen again. I will wish if anyone could give me some advise for my situation now. i am not well aware of the Thai culture and values.

    1. What country are you from? Where do you stay now? How old is your child? My best advice is to start living your life as if there was no Thai man in it… What I mean is – he might leave and do whatever he wants to do. There is nothing you can do about it really, except accept that he is his own person and that his life might not include you or your son in it. Same anywhere in the world really. The mom of my son in the USA – left with him when he was 7 mths old. Why? No idea. It was her choice and she regrets it now – but, what can we do now? I’m married here in TH and all is well. We have a lovely daughter and we’re not breaking up for anything. Life goes on… please don’t put yourself through emotional hell because of one person.

      1. I am Asian and currently living in my own country with my son and he is still around. My son is 4 months old. I do understand your advice and somehow wish that i do have the courage to do so. I am trying my best to save this marriage, reading marriage materials and all. He do claims that he loves me and our son, if not i guess he wont come back.
        From my point of view, if his parents do not get involve i am pretty sure we are one happy family, it’s just when his parents got involve he will instantly being shaky and changed. I do know that Thai children should never go against the words of their parents but then he has a child already, what more do they want? I am sorry to say but why are they so selfish? I wish that they can give me a chance to prove to them that i am a good wife to their son and have every respect to them.
        P.S. Thank you for sharing your story with me, congras with your daughter and happy marriage.

        1. I’m probably not the one to be dishing out advice for you… I tend to face reality – as hard as it is… it gives me peace of mind when I can accept that – this is the way it “is”. The reality is that there are more people than you involved… the decision is not yours – it would be easy like that. He will also decide. His parents don’t seem to have your, your son, and your husband’s best interests at heart. There could be many reasons for that. He might have a son back in Thailand too. Maybe a whole family. Who knows? There is a lot that you might not know – and so, attaching to the idea that all will go well – can make you suffer so much.

          Take care of you – and take care of your son… and he’ll do what he does… try very hard to begin to accept that now. I want whatever is best for you… sometimes what is best is not what we want. That I have found out over and over during my life… Good luck, karma, and whatever else I can give you! Cheers my friend…

  3. Hi Vern – I’m very happily married to a Thai man. But of course he’s not from a small village and he’s well educated. I met him in Bangkok AFTER he’d been living, working and studying in California for 10 years. His English is impeccable and he is well aware, and embracing of, western culture (as I am of Thai culture). He’s a highly reputable translator and web entrepreneur and he takes care of us so I can stay home with our son. We celebrate our 5 year anniversary in April! I do believe, though, that I am a rare exception in this story and I count myself lucky.

    Amy

    1. Hi Amy, Thanks for writing in… that is GOOD news! I know there are good Thai guys here – of course there are… but, are the Thai guys that go for the foreign women usually bad guys? In my experience it seems to be something like that. There are always exceptions to every rule but I’ve seen women choked in the street in Surat Thani… known fathers that beat the mom in front of the kids – often… known a 15 year old girl that got beat if she didn’t do everything her 16 year old boyfriend told her to do… Seen a 3 different guys on this soi of 20 homes wrestling their girlfriends in the street (into submission over an argument)… Seen a teacher I worked with come in to work with bruises time after time. Heard from every farang girl that I know well that the relationships they’ve had with guys here in TH have been either abusive physically or mentally. You seem to have found a good guy – very happy for you and choke dee krup!

  4. Ok… scratch that, some guys I would definitely go near (if I were not already taken, of course ;) just came to mind… mhmmmmm….. :D

Comments are closed.