Thai Male, Female Relationships (Abuse, Power Inequality)

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Thai Male - Female Relationships
Abuse, Power, Inequality?

Thai Relationships

All I know is what I've heard and seen for the past couple years. My western friends are fond of saying that the Thai girls really don't like Thai guys because they beat them, they cheat on them with girlfriends and other wives... The Thai guys get the women to support them so they can drink with their friends and so on.

I refuse to accept these gross generalizations about Thai relationships just as I refuse to accept any as a rule. I have noticed some things being in a relationship with a Thai girl for the past 22 months...

My girlfriend will NEVER ask where I was when I go out with friends if we go to bars on a weekend night. I would typically go out once or twice per month to make the rounds at bars, strip clubs, karaoke places, etc. and I'd come back to the house anywhere from 3 am to 5:30 am and she'd wake up and ask me if I needed anything, take care of me and then go back to sleep without mentioning ONE WORD EVER about what happened. I am not sure whether this is the norm or not, just one bit of data from my experience. I think that it goes back to the Thai idea of "face" and maintaining the facade of perfection in our relationship. I was always good when I went out - meaning - I never did anything I considered wrong - or my friends, male or female would consider wrong - but, still the likelihood that I DID something wrong was strong considering I was drinking a lot and coming home at those hours.

My girlfriend told me about her parents rocky relationship and that her dad used to drink a lot and hit her mom sometimes. My girlfriend ended up living with her aunt because her mom and dad's relationship wasn't very stable. Apparently this happens often in Thai culture. Again, just another data point.

I don't have a good feel for whether violence is prevalent in the husband-wife or boyfriend-girlfriend relationships for the most part . It exists, that much I've seen. Whether it is the norm or not - I'd hate to say. Female teachers at school where I work that have had Thai boyfriends all have told us horror stories about the Thai guys after a couple months of dating. They become abusive verbally, non-trusting, and eventually push, grab, or hit the girls. This was a few different girls with the stories, but again - only a couple data points. I wonder if any studies have been done on the subject...

Here is an Article I've written in my Thailand blog about a Thai guy nearly killing his wife in front of his 4 year old daughter on a public street here in Surat "Thai Guy Beats Wife in Public..."

I'll be following it up with another Article about a 15 year old girl in my class that is being threatened by her boyfriend and hit - almost daily. It will be on that Thailand blog also - you might check the right side list of Articles for it after Dec 06 - likely early January...

Here is an interesting Article about whether you should date a Thai guy or not, and how the relationship typically goes...

"Do's and Don'ts of Dating a Thai Guy" by Richard Barrow

Thai Buddha and other Buddhist Amulets shipped from Thailand. Authentic.

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